The Mayonnaise Jar & Coffee

(Explaining the priorities of Life & Make good use of time)

When things in your life seem, almost too much to handle, When 24 Hours in a day is not enough,
Remember the mayonnaise jar and 2 cups of coffee.

A professor stood before his philosophy class
And had some items in front of him.
When the class began, wordlessly,
He picked up a very large and empty mayonnaise jar And proceeded to fill it with golf balls.

He then asked the students, if the jar was full. They agreed that it was.

The professor then picked up a box of pebbles and poured Them into the jar. He shook the jar lightly.
The pebbles rolled into the open Areas between the golf balls.

He then asked the students again if the jar was full. They agreed it was.

The professor next picked up a box of sand and poured it into the jar.
Of course, the sand filled up everything else.
He asked once more if the jar was full. The students responded with a unani- mous ‘yes.’

The professor then produced two cups of coffee from under the table and poured the entire contents into the jar, effectively
Filling the empty space between the sand. The students laughed.

‘Now,’ said the professor, as the laughter subsided,

I want you to recognize that this jar represents your life.

The golf balls are the important things – family,
Children, health, Friends, and Favorite passions –
Now suppose that if everything else was lost and only they remained, your life would still be full.

The pebbles are the other things that matter like your job, house, and car. The sand is everything else —The small stuff.

‘If you put the sand into the jar first,’ He continued, There is no room for the pebbles or the golf balls. The same goes for life.

If you spend all your time and energy on the small stuff,
You will never have room for the things that are important to you.


Pay attention to the things that are critical to your happiness. Play With your children.
Take time to get medical checkups.
Take your partner out to dinner.

There will always be time to clean the house and fix the disposal.

‘Take care of the golf balls first and then pebbles second — The things that really matter.
Set your priorities. The rest is just sand.’

One of the students raised her hand and inquired what the coffee represented.

The professor smiled. ‘I’m glad you asked’.

It just goes to show you that no matter how full your life may seem, There’s always room for a couple of cups of coffee with a friend.’



Man is not at peace with himself till he has become like unto God. The endeavor to reach this state is supreme, the only ambition worth having. AND THIS IS THE SELF REALIZATION.

How can the body be made temple of God? In other words how can one be free from action i.e. from the taint of sin?

By desire less action, by renouncing the fruits of actions, by dedicating all activities to God i.e. surrendering one self to him body and soul.

He is the devotee who is jealous of none, who is a fount of mercy, who is without egotism, who is selfless, who is ever forgiving, who is always contented, whose resolutions are firm, who has dedicated mind and soul to God, who causes no dread, who is not afraid of others, who is free from exultation, sorrow and fear, who is pure, who is versed in action, and yet remains unaffected by it, who renounces all fruit, good or bad, who treat as friends and foe alike, who is untouched by respect or disrespect, who is not putted by the praise, who does not go under when people speak ill of him, who loves silence and solitude, who has a disciplined reason.

One can attain self-realization only if one sheds his attachment to the Ego. We can follow truth only in the measure that we shed our attachment to the Ego.

How to achieve Self Realization?

Go confidently in the direction of your dreams. Live the life you have imagined.

Life is made up of our memories and moments that have shaped us in to who we are.

There is crack in everything, that’s how the light gets in. You must be the change; you wish to see in the world. The future is with fate, the present is our own.

Watch your thoughts, because they become words. Watch your words, because they become actions.
Watch your actions, because they become habits.
Watch your habits, because they become your character. Watch your character, because it becomes your destiny.

What we think or what we know or what we believe is in the end of little con- sequence. The only consequence is what we do.

Hope is the thing with feathers that perches in the soul, and sings the tune – without the words. And never stops at all.

Love begins at home, and it is not how much we do… but how much love and how much we put in that action.

We think sometimes that poverty is only being hungry, naked and homeless. The poverty of being unwanted, unloved and uncared for is the greatest poverty. We must start in our own homes to remedy this kind of poverty.


Negative Emotions in Life: –

It is a fact that ultimate happiness depends on eliminating our negative behavioriors like Desire, Anger, Greed, Attachments and Ego.

But these kinds of emotions seem to be a natural part of our psychological make up. All human beings seem to experience these darker emotions to one degree or another. It seems impractical and even unnatural to try to completely eradicate something that is integral part of our natural make up. Among humans these emotions vary according the degree of emotions

But above thinking is wrong. For example all of us are born in an ignorant state. In this sense ignorance is also quite natural. When we are young we are quite ignorant, but as we grow day-by-day through education and learning we can acquire knowledge and dispel ignorance. So if we leave ourselves in a ‘natural state’ without making an effort to dispel these negative emotions, then these negative emotions will overpower your education, learning and training; whereas we should gradually reduce our negative emotions to a lesser and lesser degree and increase positive state of mind such as Love, Compassion, and Forgiveness.

There are three methods of over-powering negative emotions:

1. Valid Foundation – These two kinds of emotions (positive and negative emotions) are basically two states of mind. One way of categorizing these emotions is in terms of understanding that the positive emotions are those, which can be justified, and negative emotions are those, which cannot be justified. For instance there can be positive desire and negative desire. Desire for one’s basic needs to be met is a positive kind of desire. It is justifiable. It is based on the fact that we all exist and have the right to survive. And in order to survive there are certain things we require, certain needs that have to be met. So that kind of desire has valid foundation. Excessive desire and greed are negative desires. Those kinds of desires are not based on valid reasons and often create trouble and complicate one’s life. So we can say that positive emotions have a firm and valid foundation, and the negative emotions lack this valid foundation.

  1. Wisdom Factor – Our positive state of mind can act as antidote to our negative tendencies and delusory state of mind. The cultivation of certain specific positive mental qualities such as Patience, Tolerance, kindness and so on can act as specific antidotes to negative states of mind such as anger, hatred and attachment. Applying anti- dotes such as love and compassion can significantly reduce the degree or influence of mental and emotional afflictions. In order to fully over- come all of these negative tendencies, one must apply the antidote to ignorance – ‘Wisdom Factor’. The wisdom factor involves generat- ing insight in to the true nature of reality.
  2. Meditation – Mind of clear light – Essential nature of mind is pure. It is based on the belief that the underlying basic subtle consciousness is untainted by the negative emotions. This is achieved through Med- itation.

Therefore by these three methods mental and emotional afflictions ultimately can be eliminated through deliberately cultivating antidotal forces like love, compassion, tolerance and forgiveness, and through various practices such as meditation.


We have a longing for joy, love, and beauty that no amount or quality of food, sex, friendship, or success can satisfy. We want something that nothing in this world can fulfill. Isn’t that at least a clue that this “Something” that we want exists. This unfulfilling longing, then, qualifies as deep, innate human desire,and that makes it a major clue that there is GOD, who operates our life. Some people believe that beauty and love are just biochemical responses, in the pres- ence of great art and beauty we inescapably feel that there is real meaning in life, there is the TRUTH and JUSTICE that will never let us down, and love means everything.



What would be the approach to overcoming negative behaviors and making positive changes in one’s life?

1. The first step involves Learning and Education – The systematic training of mind. By selecting and focusing on positive mental states and challenging negative mental states. Learning and education are important because they help one to develop conviction of the need to change and help increase one’s commitment. Therefore learning and education is the first step in bringing about internal transformation, rather than more transcendental or mystical spiritual practices. In try- ing to determine the reasons for these beneficial effects of education, scientists have reasoned that better educated individuals are more aware of health risks factors, are better to implement healthier life style choices, feel a greater sense of empowerment and self esteem, have greater problem solving skills and more effective coping strate- gies – all factors that contribute to a happier, healthier life.

  1. The next step is Developing Conviction (confidence) – This con- viction to change then develops in to determination.
  2. Determination and Enthusiasm – This determination transforms in to action. This step is also widely accepted by the cotemporary Western Science as an important factor in achieving one’s goals. In certain studies psychologists have examined the lives of some Amer- ica’s most accomplished artists, athletes, and scientists and have dis- covered that drive and determination, not great natural talent, led to their success in their respective fields. As in any other field, one could assume that this principle would equally apply to the art of achieving happiness. Behavioral scientists have extensively researched the mech- anism that initiates, sustains and directs our activities and that mech- anism is called ‘Human Motivation’.
  3. Human Motivation – Psychologists have identified three principle types of motives –- a) Primary motives – are drives based on our bio- logical needs that must be met for survival. This would include for example, needs for food, water, and air. — B) Stimulation and infor- mation. – This is an innate need required for proper maturation, de- velopment and functioning of nervous system. – c) secondary motives – these are motives based on learned needs and drives. Many second- ary motives are related to required needs for success, power, status or achievement. However these motives generated are not used only in the pursuit of worldly success but develops as one gains a clearer un- derstanding of the factors that lead to true happiness and are used in the pursuit of higher goals, such as kindness, compassion, and spiritual development.
  4. Action – The strong determination to change enables one to make a sustained effort to implement the actual changes.
  5. Effort – The final factor of effort is critical. This is the final factor in bringing about change. The effort is the necessary factoring estab- lishing new conditioning. Through new conditioning we can change our negative behavior and thoughts.

7. Genetic, Social and Cultural Forces; – While science has recently revealed that one’s genetic predisposition (one’s nature) clearly plays a role in an individual’s characteristic way of responding to the world. But most social scientists and psychologists feel that a large measure of the way we behave, think and feel is determined by learning and conditioning (one’s nurture), which comes about as a result of our up- bringing and the social and cultural forces around us. And since it is believed that behaviors are established by conditioning and reinforced and amplified by ‘habituation’, this opens up the possibility of extin- guishing harmful or negative conditioning and replacing it with help- ful, life-enhancing conditioning.


What is Real Sense of Life?

Life is but a stage,
And we all have part to play.

Life is but a journey,
And we go through ups and downs together.

Life is but a dream,
And when we finally wake up, it might be over.

Life is but a game,
And yet we take it so seriously.

Life is but a comedy,
And yet we cry with all our mighty.

Life is but a love song,
And yet we close our ears to its lyrics.

Life is but a paradise
And yet we choose not to see its beauty.

Life is Love,
Life is beauty,
Life is opportunity,
But only to those who choose to see it that way.


Why does one feel fear? How do we overcome it?

Fear is felt when anticipated. Anticipation is again an instrument we handle ourselves.

There is nothing to fear but fear itself.

Values and Education: –

Values are inherited through tradition, upbringing and personal development. All these factors, along with the education we receive from institutions, are what we symbolize a person’s character.

Shadows of Life: –

We run after money, fame and joy, to attain happiness, to be at peace with ourselves. Yet when we attain them, the satisfaction is temporary. And there is no peace.